So. Here’s the scenario: You start dating a guy (“Boy”). After the first few dates, where you both return to your own respective abodes directly after dinner, you start to go home together. In fact, you end up sleeping (the “zzz” kind) with Boy about three times a week.
All of a sudden, three months goes by and you realize: HE’S BEEN TO YOUR PLACE THREE TIMES. That’s it. THREE TIMES. In three months.
That’s approximately 36 sleepovers total, with only THREE at Girl’s Place. 33:3. NOT A TERRIBLY EQUITABLE RATIO.
[Note: In this particular scenario, HIS & HERS apts are a 40 minute subway ride or a $15 cab ride apart. In other words, the real world consequences of time or money expended are very, well, real.]
Concerned that a pattern might be set, you bring up Gross Unfairness of Situation to Boy, who - shockingly (in your mind) - insists that the ratio is The Way Things Should Be.
What?! You can’t believe this! A 95-5 split is The Way Things Should Be?! You weren’t advocating 50-50, but 70-30 seems a bit more fair!
No, says Boy. And now he gives his reasons - or, “FACTORS,” as he calls them:
- proximity to trains/transport
- respective times parties have to get up/go to work (morning commitments like the gym)
- size/comfort of respective apartments
- broad equality/inequality in situation/extent to which apartment inequality can restore balance
- broad idea that girl goes to guy’s apt.
You: is there such an idea?????
Boy: THERE IS SUCH AN IDEA.
Really, now.
You add, “How about #6. obdurateness of respective parties?”
And of course, whose bed is bigger/more comfortable?
So, readers, time to weigh in. What do you think?
- 1) Do you predominantly stay at one person’s apartment over the other? Why?
- 2) In a battle of wills, who gets to say where you’ll stay? What are the factors you include?
- 3) And finally, IS there such an idea as “girl goes to guy’s apt”???
This will be the TOPIC FOR TMI Weekly (to be taped next Tues, airing the following week). Email me at Julia@NonSociety.com.
