After stealth-reading Glamour’s Wedding blog (total guilty pleasure), I asked the above question - should you do a first look? - on my Twitter, and Katie, a longtime reader and wedding photographer, chimed in with a thoughtful answer.  I’ve always seen myself as a traditionalist, but she may well have convinced me!  Which, uh, obviously solves a totally pressing matter, because you all know I’m getting married next week. ;)  WHEW.

From: Katie Lewis
Date: January 26, 2010 3:18:12 PM EST
To: Julia Allison <julia@nonsociety.com>
Subject: Reasons…

Hey Julia,
Okay so this comes from a photographers stand point but I really believe that once these reasons are told to a bride and groom, most would agree that seeing each other before going down the aisle is a good idea.

Okay most people still believe in the whole, ‘it’s bad luck’ thing but lets be really honest here. There are thousands of people who never saw each other before hand and they are now divorced. So that’s just silly. I think people don’t realize how crazy a wedding day actually is. You are constantly surrounded by people and really don’t have any time with just you and your fiance until well after the wedding, and by then you are more than likely just going to pass out. A first look is just the two of you. Nobody else but maybe a photographer and you can just be alone for an hour. If my couples want to do a first look I always take them someplace where they will be alone and from there go straight into the portrait session with just the two of them. That gives them a solid hour to be with each other and not worry about having to talk to everyone else. After that is when we meet up with the wedding party and then do family portraits. Then comes the wedding.

Now in my opinion, if you were going to cry walking down the aisle or watching your bride walk down the aisle, you will still do this despite seeing each other before hand. I mean, that moment is still an amazing moment and it’s not because of what you are wearing or how you look. It’s because you are walking down this aisle and are about to share vows that will bind you to this person for the rest of your life. That is still an intense walk and if you don’t cry, you probably weren’t going to be one of those brides/grooms in the first place. I can’t tell you how many brides have still bawled their eyes out and how many grooms have still gotten choked up even after having that first look.

In the end, it gives you alone time that you won’t have any other time on your wedding day. You will get pictures out of the way so that after your wedding you can just relax and not feel rushed and be able to spend time with family and friends during the cocktail hour or if you take a party bus around, etc. Also, if you have a receiving line right after the ceremony people HIGHLY underestimate how long those take to get through. No joke, most take longer than the ceremony itself. This leaves you even less time for pictures especially if you want to get family pictures (because you couldn’t include the groom/bride before hand if you did family pictures) and you still need to get pictures with your wedding party and together. By this time all you want to do is relax and not feel rushed. And you will if you wait until afterwards.

Well that is just my opinion but I think if brides and grooms really looked at how their day is laid out and really think about how they want to spend the time after their ceremony, most would agree that a first look just makes sense.

Hope that helps!!
Katie
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Katie Lewis
Katie Lewis Photography
www.katielewisphotography.com
www.katielewisphotography.com/blog